Survival Bracelets

Michael and I finally purchased our Paracord bracelets. They're a fashionable addition to our survival gear. For those of you who don't know what these are, basically it's a bracelet made out of a very strong string that can be used for anything imaginable! Each bracelet carries several feet of cord, even though it's only a few inches in diameter (mine is seven inches).

Girls, they are SEVERAL colors and combinations to choose from. You can even add beads to them. Mine wasn't quite what I expected, but am eager to get another. I chose "moss" and "turquoise" in the weave pattern (as shown below).

Visit the website here to order yours! The shipping was SUPER fast, even though it we selected standard ground shipping. We ordered on Saturday and they were delivered on Wednesday. From Arizona to our home in Wisconsin.

The Retail Worker's Curse

When I started my first job at 16 years old, it was as a bagger/cashier at Copps Food Center. Later in college I quit Copps and began working at Menards as a cashier, and later a sales rep. That is eight years of retail, and eight years of saying "hello" to every single customer I saw, whether they wanted help from me or not. And even though I don't work in retail any more, I continue to smile strangers... Everywhere. When I'm shopping at Target, I grin and nod my head to passersby. While strolling through the produce aisles at Festival Foods I perk up and say hi to the lady next to me picking out Red Delicious Apples.

Some ignore me, some raise their eyebrows, some wearily return a smile and very few reply with a cheery hello. I don't want to acknowledge them, my body just does it. It's almost like a reflex now. I know how to kick a habit, but how do you kick a reflex? I'm starting to think you don't...

Things I Hate: Noisy Birds and Movie Talkers

There is a bird's nest on the top our air conditioner, so every morning around 5 I wake up to chirping. I hate it. I am not Thoreau, and I do not feel like I'm one with nature. I feel inconvenienced for leaving my window open. Like I'm being punished for saving electricity and enjoying the crisp night air.

What are they talking about anyway? Are they discussing their plans for the day in great detail? Assigning their daily duties?

"Barry, you get breakfast. Joney, you're on lunch. That leaves dinner for you, Sam. And I want dessert! Make it good. We're all counting on you." And that's when a fight breaks out, because Joney is sick of being bossed around by Lou.

These thoughts are probably why it takes me FOREVER to fall back asleep after slamming the window shut in hopes to scare them away for a bit.

Secondly, Mike and I went to see Hunger Games on Friday. Good movie. Loud neighbors. They wouldn't shut up despite the numerous sharp head-turning glares I sent their way. I kept wanting to say something to them, but then I got nervous they'd say something really clever back, and I wouldn't have a comeback and I'd look like a fool. This has been a problem for me since like middle school. It's a shame, really. They would comment as the movie unfolded. Things like, "Oh, what's she doing now? ...Oh! That's right, yada yada yada." And other times it'd be telling the other about earlier that day when so and so did such and such. They'd carry out a full conversation and laugh, saying "And I told him no, it's exactly the opposite! EXACTLY THE OPPOSITE!" Hardee har har. And she slurped her soda. 

House Buying Progress!

Since I'm the most impatient person in the universe, trying to buy a house is the most drawn-out experience ever. But, this morning I was able to call a real estate agent to set up an appointment for a house showing! 

Because I'm a temporary employee and was struggling to get a loan, my friend Alvin told me to call his step mom who is a loan originator. She is AMAZING! She did exactly what I wanted. I gave her all of our information and told what the price point we wanted. Then she did all this stuff behind the scenes with her tools and knowledge and now she is confident we'll be pre-approved for the amount we asked for! On April 1st we'll know for sure. Nope, not an April Fool's joke. The company she works for is partnering with a new service, so she needs to wait until then to officially pre-approve us. Otherwise, if we do it now with their current service, it probably won't happen. 

I feel like an expert on credit and home buying now after speaking with her. She has explained everything to me so clearly. Obviously I know like .0002% of what she does, but I am just ecstatic! Of course I say this now, but when my water heater dies and my roof leaks I'll be singing another tune!

DIY Record Bowls

 So after making the mail organizer from cheap records (click here for details), I had a lot of leftovers. After thinking of what I can do with them, I decided to make some bowls. Here's how I did it...

I used:

• A baking sheet
• Tin Foil
• Records (duh)
• Stainless steel mixing bowls--3 different sizes: in my set of four, I used the small, medium, and second largest
• Work gloves, oven mits or an old T-shirt to transfer the hot record into bowls

I lined a baking sheet with tin foil, and set the oven for 250 degrees. Once the oven was pre-heated, I placed the record on top of the foil-lined pan and stuck it in the oven to "cook" for two minutes. When I pulled it out, I used an old T-shirt to transfer the now soft record into a stainless steel mixing bowl. It ruffled itself inside the mixing bowl, and then I used another smaller mixing bowl (the next size down) to flatten the bottom of the record by putting it inside the record that was inside the bigger bowl. Once it's cooled off a bit (about 30 seconds to a minute) I took it out of the mixing bowl and was done! Super easy!

If the ruffles are too uneven for your taste, you can plop it back into the oven for another two minutes. It softens the record flat again so you can reform it.

I found placing the record inside the bowl gave me the best results. I also tried draping it over the top of an upside down mixing bowl, but didn't have the greatest luck that way. I think it'd be fun to use some smaller square dishes, but I didn't have any, so that's a bummer!

Since I didn't need five record bowls, I gave them away to friends who were a little too excited about them. I was surprised by the Facebook reaction I got to them. Before giving them away, I personalized them like I did the mail organizer. Here's one I gave to my work BFF, Molly. 

I used a picture of her kid, I mean dog, Eddie. Using Publisher, I changed the shape of the picture to a 5" circle and printed it out. I used Mod Podge to glue the picture inside over the existing label. 

As always, if you have any questions please don't hesitate to ask in the comments!

Hanging Mail Organizer From Records

I found this idea on Pinterest. You can see the original blog post here. I pretty much followed it to a T, except I only used two rivets, mainly because I hate the rivet tool! It takes a lot of arm muscle, which I do not have. I also personalized the record labels. Since this was a gift for my step dad, I used Publisher to print out the names of his past bands and current one. (He and my mom have been playing in a band since I can remember. They play rock music like Metallica, KISS, AC/DC plus newer stuff like Weezer, STP and Foo Fighters. Mom plays bass, step dad plays guitar and sings.)

I'm so sorry I don't have a video or photos to show you these steps. It is easy and difficult at the same time... If you have any questions at all, please don't hesitate to ask in the comments!

 Items you'll need:

• Records--I got mine from the $.25 bin at our local music store. Make sure you have extras in case you screw up like me. :)
• Rivets and rivet tool--I got mine from Menards, the cheapest ones they had
• Drill bit (and drill) to match the size of your rivets. I believe I used 3/8" but it really doesn't matter (as long as it's not like a 3" rivet, that'd be ridiculous).
• Old T-shirt
• Aligator clamps
• Iron
• If you personalize the record labels like I did, you'll need Mod Podge or glue. I used Mod Podge to help protect the paper from being torn.

To shape the record, I put it in an old T-shirt and then ran my iron (set to the hottest temperature) over the bottom half for quite a while. Once the entire bottom half is flexible, I wrapped it up and over a paper towel cardboard tube. It's important to make sure the record is heated through the center where the label is so you can begin your bend there. That's where you place the cardboard tube, and then you just flop the bottom half over that and hold in place until cooled.

I bent it while it was still inside the T-shirt because I did not have work gloves, and didn't feel like burning my hands. I found this worked fine, but if you have work gloves, by all means you can take the record out of the shirt before bending it over the tube.

To avoid rippling in the record, I tried to hold it as still as possible and only touching the parts that wrap around the tube. Try to make this as smooth and level as possible because you string the records together by adding rivets to the back of the first record and the lip on the second. If there's rippling on the lip that you bent, it may crack when you put the rivet in. (Which I learned the hard way, so please learn from my mistake.)

Also, when you bend the record up to form the lip, it's best to line the top of the lip the center of the label (where the hole is). I found this to be the best way to measure.

Once all the records were shaped and cooled, I began drilling the holes. It really helps to have clamps to hold the two records in place while you drill. I did not have clamps and I wanted to cry. But, as you can see below, it can be done! If you want to be really picky you can use white out or something to line the rivets up evenly on all your records. I just eyeballed it.

As I said above, you place the back of one record to the bent part of the second (as shown in picture above). Once the holes are drilled, the rivets secure the two records together. I pieced together the chain of records one at a time. So I drilled, then put the rivets in. Then I drilled the next record on and put the rivets in.

I added the personalizations at the very end, but if you're not adding those, then you're done! Read no further! I did not add a hanger to the back of it, because you can hang it by a nail through the the top record's hole.

To make my labels, I scanned my step dad and mom's bands' CD booklets into my computer, and used Paint to trim them off--which was a pain in the A. If you've ever used Paint for an actual project you'll understand.

I put their band name into 5.2" circles so they were a tad bit bigger than the original label. I put Mod Podge down on the existing label, and placed my printout on top and smoothed it out. Once it was in place, I added some Mod Podge around the edges to prevent peeling. And then I was done. Thank God, because this was a hard project for me! Worth it, though, since he loved it!

Do Not Broil: How to Not Cook Porkchops

Mike was super excited for some stuffed porkchops we bought at Festival. I'm not a big fan of pork, and have never cooked it before, so when I asked Michael what to bake it on, he told me to use our glass dish.

After 30 minutes of baking at 350 degrees, they were almost done. He just wanted to brown them a bit, so he bumped up the temperature. After about five or 10 minutes he announced that they were "browning up real nice" and he turned the oven off. Not one minute later do we hear a shattering crash from the oven. Mike opened the oven door slightly to find the pork chops resting on a cushion of broken glass. He was right--they were browned up real nice.

Turns out he cranked the eat up to BROIL. While I wouldn't have suggested broil, I also wouldn't have known that my glass baking dish cannot survive that kind of heat. I'm just glad it happened in the oven, not in Mike's hands. It seemed like it broke downard, rather than a full-blown explosion, but we didn't risk eating the porkchops just in case there were some shards jammed in there.

Mike felt horrible about it, saying it was the stupidest thing he's ever done. I'm just glad I wasn't on cleanup duty. We don't have a broom/dustpan, our handheld vacuum doesn't have good suction, and we weren't really comfortable using our actual vacuum for glass. So, Mike used tongs, a spatula, a serving spoon and a damp rag to get all the glass out. There may or may not be some undetected sandy pieces still at the bottom.

Shooting Range Excursion

Yesterday my friend came to town to go shooting with Michael and me. She's shot a deer rifle before, but that's it. So, even though it was a SUPER windy day (25 mph winds), we headed to the outdoor gun range. It was pretty busy considering the weather. We started out shooting Mike's AR. That's always fun; it's my favorite!

This is my friend Mindy shooting the AR. She is now addicted! (Notice her hair being whipped around from the wind!)

This is me with the AR from a different range we went to in September. (I don't have one of me from yesterday's excursion.)

The picture of the target below is my bullseye with the AR from January when Mike and I went to test out his new scope I bought him for Christmas. He did not get a bullseye that day ;)
 

The range we went to yesterday is in the process of building the seven yard area for shooting hand guns, so normally we'd shoot from the 15 yard range. But, it was so busy that there wasn't a spot open, so we shot from the 25 yard range. The distance was bad enough, but with the horrible winds it was even worse. But, I just had to shoot my lavendar lady... It had been too long.


                                                                       Isn't it pretty?

I'm so glad Mindy came to the range with us, because I think it's important to be comfortable with guns. Naturally she was nervous. There are tons of things to think about--flying bullets, the kickback, misfires, etc. But she had a blast, walked away with knowledge and feels confident handling them (she even wants to buy one now). When Mike first introduced me to guns I was super nervous. I wasn't around them as a kid, so I was as far away from comfortable as you can get--simply touching one made me edgey. Shooting has definitely become a fun hobby for me now. My aim still needs some work, but who knows, maybe if I get really good you'll see me on Top Shot.

Lyrics Necklace

My first Pinterest project I did, was this necklace. I changed it up a bit from the original post, which you can see here. Unfortunately I only have an after picture. I got all my supplies from Hobby Lobby.

Supplies I used:
paper
printer
Mod Podge
paint brush (a foam brush may be better)
30" chain (I chose gun metal color for chain, clasp and jump rings)
clasp
jump rings
beads
lighter (the long candle ones)
needle nose pliers
chain cutter

Instead of using book pages like the original tutorial, I printed out lyrics in different fonts to some of my favorite songs by my favorite band, Alkaline Trio, along with their heart skull symbol. The original tutorial used foam board, and I really wish that I had, too. I used regular computer paper. It works, and it's still pretty (I think), but the charms are so light that they flip backward a lot when I wear it. I think that if they were heavier (like foam board) they'd stay put better. I have been thinking about adding weight to the backs of them. Maybe smaller buttons or something?

So, after printing out the lyrics I wanted, I cut out five circles and covered them in Mod Podge. A lot of Mod Podge (both front and back). Be patient, wait about 20 minutes in between coats. I think I did like three layers of it. Also, if you use a regular paint brush be careful not to leave lines from the bristles. That's why I think a foam brush would be better. I used a damp paper towel to help clear any lines I saw. I'd recommend Viva Towels, because they're unquilted so they won't leave more lines. After about five to seven minutes of drying you can start to tell if it will be liney, so that's how long I recommend waiting to see if lines form.

Once they're dried, I burned the edges with a long lighter. I did this step over the kitchen sink, and had the water running from the faucet the whole time. I held the charm with piers in one hand, and ran the lighter over the edges with the other. I blew out the flame when it was singed to my liking. It wasn't as scary as I anticipated. I also tested Mod Podge's flammability on a plain piece of paper first. No scary moments happened, so hopefully you have good luck as well! Like I said, keep the faucet running just in case!

Once they're all burned, I painted some more Mod Podge on them all again to protect them, and keep the burned edges from just falling off. I added another couple of coats. The ashes can blur into the words, though so be careful. Paint inward out.

Next was the hard part (for me anyway): putting the necklace together. First I attached the clasp to the chains, one strand being shorter than the other so that the two strands wouldn't be on top of each other. I don't know if there's a better way to do this, but I just put it on in front of a mirror, held my fingers to the length I thought was best, took it off, cut the chain and voila! There are mannequins you can buy to help fit and make necklaces, but since I'm not a serious jewelry maker, so I didn't have one!

Those darn jump rings are tricky. When I do other jewelry I like to use the keychain-looking jump rings, but because these charms were so fragile, I used the normal ones. I put the charms on first, eyeballing it to where it would look good. Trying it on many times and then placing the charms on. I used two links of chain to attach the white beads over top of the charm.

It's a time-consuming project, but I love my necklace! I get compliments on it whenever I wear it. :) I hope all my steps make sense, but if you have any questions please ask them in the comments and I'll be happy to answer!

Scaredy Cat Syndrome (SCS)

As many of my friends know, I'm a jumpy person. I startle too easily. I'm the person who jumps when the toaster pops. I have an anxiety attack anytime I need to open a tube of Pillsbury biscuits, because I know that at any moment it's going to explode. General Mills should really invest in a new opening system for those... Just sayin'.

I'm probably going to have a heart attack by the time I'm 30 because I am incapable of relaxing. I've read mixed things online about this jumpy behavior correlating with stress, so who knows. I saw someone ask how to control this problem on an online forum, and someone suggested to have people scare him on purpose all the time so he gets used to it. I don't think this will work. Two of my old roommates attempted this (not because they wanted to condition me, but because they were entertained), and it just made me more skiddish. 

My grandma was a little jumpy, so perhaps it's hereditary; although, I believe I've taken it to an all new level of ridiculousness. I know I live with Michael. I know he's home at the same time I am. But if he suddenly decides to walk past me without subtly letting me know, I jump 10 feet into the air! I have even been known to freak out over a dark shadow that looks like a person/bear/dog/cat just standing there. Sometimes I don't jump or show physical signs of anguish, but I still get that shock of adrenaline (followed by a minor hot flash).

It's really getting out of hand, so I searched for daily relaxation tips hoping to find some wonderful ideas, but  found nothing of use. Examples included take a bath, aromatherapy, read a book, listen to music, meditate and don't worry about time. Maybe I'm just too cynical, but I feel as though that's not going to help reverse 24 (almost 25) years of Scaredy Cat Syndrome.

Here's hoping I can learn to go with the flow and be less high-strung...

Continued Credit Chaos & Home Loan Woes

Early in February I had to dispute seven claims on my credit report that were not mine (you can read about it here). Finally, I got an email saying that the results were in, and I am happy to announce that they were all deleted from my credit report! But, the next day I received a letter addressed to this person who has all this negative information on my credit report. I open it, and it's from the collection agency in Chicago needing over $2,000 for unpaid rent. The letter explains that I need to send in documentation to support my claim that the information is false. But they do not say what documentation is required, and the bottom of the letter says "Enc." yet, there is no enclosure. Plus, it's addressed to the other Jessica. So, really good.

I call the collection agency to see what they want, but no one answers, so I leave a message. (I'd like to point out that the phone number was not listed on the letter, so I had to Google it.) This was on Saturday. Never receiving a call back, I call them on Thursday, and tell this lady my story to which she replies, "OK. Hold on please." I get transferred to a ringing phone with the an answering machine at the end. So I leave my name and problem on it again. How frustrating!

Michael's mom does collection stuff at her job, and told me that the agency needs to prove to me that I lived in these apartments that I owe money to, and because I never lived in Chicago it's obviously not a problem.

So since my credit report is cleared of all information that isn't mine, I made an appointment with the bank for our home loan. Michael and I had our appointment yesterday, and while the information was deleted, and my credit score skyrocketed, the new credit report still showed the wrong information. I guess some credit bureaus only report once a month, so it may not be actually removed for a bit yet. But the bank lady wasn't sure why my score skyrocketed if these claims are on my report still. So, that's a mystery. Regardless, my new credit score put me in the bracket that qualifies for the best APR rate on a loan! I am so proud of my score!

We were pretty much about to be pre-approved, though, when she asked about my employer. Turns out there's absolutely no way around being a temp employee. They sell their APR rate, so it's this secondary market's rule. I was so bummed, because the first bank we went to told me that since I'd been there for a year, it wasn't really a problem anymore. But this loan lady told us that she had someone who had been a temp employee for four years, and was still denied. I did SO much back and forth with these people, and it could have all been avoided if she looked at my employer and the check-mark I put by "temporary staffing agency" or whatever it was that I checked.

Next steps? Call the first bank back and set up an appointment. I hope that this "one year" rule still applies for the loan we need from them, otherwise we're going to be renting for a long time. It's so discouraging for me.