Welcome to Motherhood... Kind of.

Since we welcomed our puppy, Caliber, into our home, I find myself doing a lot of things I never thought I'd do. For instance, I talk for my dog. A lot. He tends to be very polite this way. I refer to myself in third person (as "mom", "mommy", or "mama"). For example, "Mama loves you! Yes she does! She loves you soooooo much!" I talk to him a lot. It's rather ridiculous. I narrate my life to him, and I doubt he even cares. "Mama is going to the kitchen to do the dishes!" "OK, crazy lady... Thanks for the update. I'm gonna continue to chew on my toy."

He hasn't had his final puppy booster shot yet, so I'm a bit paranoid of him meeting other dogs we don't know. Which happened on last night's walk. A very nice grey poodle named Zoey came out to greet us around the block. We let them hang out for a few moments introducing themselves, and the whole time I was panicking that Zoey had 87 different types of transferable bacterium she was passing to Caliber. They were certainly all fatal. Cesar would not approve of this meeting unless we knew Zoey's medical history was outstanding. We walked around the corner, and I expressed my paranoia to Michael. I suddenly stopped and said, "Oh my God. I'm that person--Oh my God, I'm your sister!" You see, one of his sisters was a freak with her first child. I make fun of her (even to her face) about how crazy she seemed to me. Sanitizing everything, not allowing her apple juice because it would make her hyper, etc.

It's been quite an adventure these past three weeks with Caliber. He makes me so happy, scared, upset and paranoid. All totally worth it. As long as he doesn't chew my valuables that is! ;) He's still doing well with his training. He usually listens, unless he's tired or playful. I'm finding it very hard to teach him to "stay". Sometimes it's hard for me to remember he's just a puppy and still has time to learn. He figured out how to bark a week and a half ago, and he occasionally gets sassy--especially if he really wants to bite your toes that you've hidden under your legs!

Puppy Love

Michael and I brought home a beautiful puppy, Caliber, on Saturday, July 7. I've had his name picked out months before we even bought the house. He's a 9-weeks-old German Shepherd from Jerland Kennels. Mike has been wanting a dog from there for nine years. It's a very reputable breeder from Barron, Wisconsin. The owner trained the German Shepherd in Beverly Hills Chihuahua. He also raised and trained the mom to the German Shepherd who plays Jerry Lee in K9 Cop. They are true German Shepherds, bred on strict Germany guidelines.

Caliber is from the last litter V Kalli von der Werther-Muhle SchH III KKL1a will ever have. Kalli was V10 at the 2007 SV Bundessiegerzuchtschan, on Sep 2nd, in Braunschweig, Germany. This contest is only open to the top 100 dogs via invitation only. He has only good reviews. I typically don't care about any of this stuff (I learned so much about breeding when we went to Jerland). I would have adopted a dog from the humane society, but it's great to know he comes from "good blood" because Jerland guarantees against hip displaysia and other common large breed ailments because of their good, strict breeding. They also offer free training sessions from their German trainer. We're going to take him when he's older, it's just gonna suck because it's a 3.5 hour car ride one way for us! Because of all these things, we spent entirely way too much money on the little guy. We are strapped for cash now, but how are you supposed to choose a different puppy when he puts his paw on your hand? 

Caliber has been doing exceptionally well adjusting to his new home. Only two accidents in the house since we've had him for a week and two days. He has a wonderful temperment, meaning he isn't scared by sudden noises (like when I use the shredder, or drop a kettle, etc.) or charge at you when you come through the door. He already understands a few commands, but he can be super stubborn at times! Definitely a puppy! The only "drr" thing he does is eat rocks and dirt. The dirt I can understand, the rocks I'm annoyed by. He could choke or chip a tooth, or God knows what... Unfortunately our yard has a hard time growing grass because of all the shade we have. We decided to put sod over the portion of the yard that is basically a rock garden to deter this.

The first time I put him in his outdoor pen I thought I was going to die. I felt like the worst mom in the universe. He's getting much better now, and so am I! He still whimpers a bit, but it's not horrible. We give him water, his toys and it's very well shaded! Thank God we haven't had any super hot days that I needed to go to work and leave him in there. We opted to use this outdoor pen, because it was already here when we moved in. It has a dog house that we'll need to rebuild to make bigger in a few months, but overall it's great. It's a 10X10 fenced in area behind our garage. The dog house actually attaches to the garage and there's a door that connects it to the garage.

Michael and I aren't really into the whole kenneling your dog thing. We're gone at work for eight hours a day, and until he's older he can get into a lot that I can prevent while I'm gone. I don't want him cooped up for that amount of time. Our breeder suggested we use the outdoor pen because they enjoy being outside. It's better than being baby-gated into a portion of my kitchen. And I agree--unless it's too hot, then obviously inside is more ideal.






He is such a good boy (most of the time). He really filled a part of my heart I didn't know was empty. 

Enemy Number One: Earwigs

Ever since day one of owning our new home, I noticed a buzzing noise whenever I opened the front door. People thought I was nuts, because it only happened if you hadn't opened it in quite a while, and no one ever heard it. I was convinced there was something living inside my door frame, since the noise always came from the top of the door jam. Finally Mike heard it too, and I wasn't crazy any more.


Then one day I was coming inside and saw an earwig on the outside of my front door. I instantly convinced myself they were the culprits living in my door! I picture them crowding inside my door frame in one large hoard. Sick! Sick! Sick!


Then I saw an earwig on the inside of my house. Then I found a few more. I called a pest control company right away and they came the next day and sprayed all around the outside of my house to stop earwigs (and any other pests) from trudging into MY home (a 30 day guarantee). I felt better having my home soaked in pesticides, and I stopped panicking anytime there was dirt on the floor (or just a dark spot on the wood-like laminate flooring we have). Then two days later I saw one darting across my wall late at night. OMG, they go up walls! Mike was asleep and if I woke him up for this he'd be very unhappy.


This little guy was fast, so I had to act fast. I grabbed a paper towel, wrapped it around Mike's shoe (never use your own--ew!), and smacked it. Eeeeeek! Why is it so hard for girly girls to kill bugs? Because they're sick, that's why. And you gotta get real close and they could suddenly have springs for legs and jump into your eye.


So I decided the best thing to do was read all about earwigs.


Orkin's website tells me they are not venomous, they do NOT go into people's ears and eat their brains--it's an old wives' tale--they rarely bite and probably just ventured into my home by human error--like the door was left open, or there's a hole in the window screen. They like warm, damp places, leaves and vegetation. OK. Feeling better.


But then I looked across my desk and saw my little potted plant. It has moist soil. I began to panic again, because obviously it was hosting an earwig party. Finally, I worked up my courage, grabbed the red ceramic pot and rushed it outside to the garage. Whew. Close call. Next I inspected our entryways and windows--nothing too obvious, but earwigs are tiny. Back to the computer.


I did a little research on how to get rid of earwigs, and this is what I came up with:

• Invite their enemy to your yard--birds. Get bird feeders or bird baths so they hang out (and hunt) in your area.
• Spray your plants/gardens with warm, soapy water--it acts as a natural pesticide. 
• Clear away leaves and other yard debris from your house so they aren't as close.
• Use dehumidifiers in your crawl space and attic to make it uninviting to them.
• Put vegetable oil in a small container where you think they are--They climb in, get stuck and die. 

And of course these tips were found on multiple websites, and forums. So I read the comments, and despite Orkin's professional documentation about earwigs, there were a few people who said they had an earwig in their ear. Oh. My. God. IN THEIR EAR! I know, I know--Mike and I have a house rule to not believe anything you read on the Internet (you can read about that here). But, this is different! Another person had an infestation in their bed. Where they sleep. Where I was headed...


Needless to say, my house plant is still in the garage, and earwigs are now on my long list of Things That Make Me Shriek. 

No Red Flag

Since our move I have had a hard time with the postal service. Our mail box is attached to our house (the walk-up kind), and it does not have a red flag or ribbon to alert the mail carrier to pick up my mail. I keep getting mail addressed to the previous tenant, and it just sits in my mail box. I feel like I need a flashing pink neon sign that reads, "For the love of God, take my outgoing mail!" Mike and I are going out tonight to find a solution. We're hoping to just find a red flag to screw on to our existing box. My dad has an old red ribbon that someone just taped into their mail box. Where do you get plastic red ribbon? The closest thing I have is a "The choice for me is drug free" red ribbon from God knows when.

Red flag woes aside, there is one other problem I had with the mail. On June 13 a package from Target arrived on my doorstep addressed to the previous tenant of my new home. The mail carrier didn't take the package even though I used a pink Sharpie to write "RTN to sender--not at this adderess". I gave it two days, but there it sat. I brought it in each night in case it rained. So I emailed Target asking if they could arrange UPS or FedEx (whoever their delivery service is) to come take it back since it's not my problem.

They requested multiple numbers and information from the shipping label (because apparently my address and her name were not enough clues). So, I sent them all the information I could gather from the label.

They returned telling me to print a return label and take it to a UPS store, and they are sending me a $5 Target gift card for the inconvenience. I also found out the order was placed on June 8. The previous tenant moved out the first weekend in May, so it's not really my fault she failed to update her address.

I told them I am not wasting any more time, or going out of my way to return this package to a UPS store. So, either they can arrange to have UPS pick it up, or I will drop it off at my local Target when I drive by it later today.

Am I being a total bitch? Maybe, but seriously I don't feel like wasting my ink, time or energy finding a UPS store and returning this girl's purchase just because she didn't bother to change her address. Perhaps this will lead to bad karma? I didn't try to steal it though, and I was dying to know what was inside.

So I dropped off the package at Target later that day. I was explaining the whole situation to the lady at the service desk, when she decided to open the box to find a packing slip. While I didn't think that was necessary, I was happy to find that it was a Mr. Coffee coffee maker. Whew, mystery solved. A little disappointed that it wasn't something super expensive though.

Next thing I know, I am being asked to select a reason for the return on the credit card machine. I said, "I don't want to return it, it's not mine." She exasperatedly replied, "I know, I know, but I cannot get past this part until you select a reason.So just pick one--any one--it doesn't matter" So I randomly chose "Changed my mind". Then I was told that $30 something will be returned to her credit card. I stepped back and said, "No! I do not have authorization to credit her credit card! I don't want to return it for money, I want to give it back to Target, so they can send it back to wherever it came from!" And I walked away.

I really feel like if the lady would have just listened to my explanation fully before jumping into opening the box, it would have gone a lot smoother. The fact that she said "...returned to HER credit card" I know she knew I wasn't the person who ordered it. I just need to make this face: O_o

Although all this was a nuisance, it was not at the fault of Target, so taking the $5 gift card makes me feel really guilty.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

There are few regrets I have in life, but what I did last Friday is definitely on that short list.

Before we purchased our new washer and dryer I talked to friends and family and read a lot of online reviews and forums. On a forum, someone wrote they thought the Whirlpool Duet washing machine was cool because it holds all the detergent for you from the bottle, and automatically dispenses it in the machine each wash. Mike and I ended up buying the Duet washer/dryer set because they were on sale at Menards with 0 payments and 0 interest for 12 months.

When we got it all set up and running, I didn't see in the directions where it said you could pour the entire detergent bottle in the washer, so I didn't. I did a few loads normally. Then Mike mentioned it as a feature to my parents, and I chimed in saying that I did it the old fashioned way, because the directions don't say that you can. And these appliances have tons of options... I'm not sure what they all are, even! Thank God there's a cycle called "normal" so I know what to fall back on!

But, last Friday... Last Friday I was feeling brave. I poured my entire bottle of detergent down the hole of my brand new washing machine. It's an HE washer and detergent, so it was good for 64 loads! After a few seconds, somehow my hand slipped a bit and I accidentally got some on the wall... Obviously God was slapping my hand saying "Stop!" But, I was all "Pfft... what does God know?!"

As I was emptying the soap into the washer, my gut was screaming "THIS IS WRONG!" I doubted it every step of the way, so I'm not sure why I continued to dump it in. But, it didn't start leaking or seem to get full. Once my canister was empty, I got even more paranoid to push the start button. So I sat on hold with Whirlpool for 12 minutes before someone answered. He was in Tennessee, and all I could picture was Ernie from Bent Forks, Tennessee (a character from "I Love Lucy"). Our conversation didn't go well. I told him which model I had, and asked if this "feature" was real. He said, "no." And he stuck to that answer. Then I asked him, "What if I already poured the entire bottle of detergent into the washing machine?" He kept telling me I shouldn't even be able to pour that much detergent in. I told him that it never started leaking, or backing up, or anything. He was insistent that I get it out if I can, because you're only supposed to use 1/2 cup at most. He didn't make me feel better, since he had to ask if my machine has a drawer I open to dispense the detergent... I'm not sure that he even truly knew what machine I was talking about, actually. He told me that if I run it with that much detergent in the washer, the suds could leak out the front, as well as back up the drain and leak suds there. Oh. My. God. What have I done?

I ran to True Value for a suction gun. The tube would NOT fit down the hole, so I finally called Michael. In tears. He was awesome and told me we'd get it out. So I ran back to True Value and got two sizes of flexible hose, both which still would NOT go down the hole. Please God fix this.

We have our washer/dryer stacked to save room, so thankfully I could help Mike lift the dryer down. I asked him if we should take the clothes out I had in there, but he said "No, it won't make a difference." I tell you this, because you'll find it amusing later on.

A handful of screws and a disconnected hose later, we got nothin'. The detergent doesn't go anywhere. We have no idea. We decide to put it back together, and this is where Mike gets cut up. The hose we disconnected is very flexible, and the metal tie that secures it to the plastic piece requires plyers. Basically, you need about five hands doing something, and there's barely room for one hand in this space. Plus, the opening where Mike needed to put his hands was edged in sharp metal. Pretty cool. Eventually, Mike got it re-attached.

So we finally decide to take the clothes out and run the washer. Well, when I was taking them out, I found the detergent. It goes right to the bottom of the drum. The bottom layer of laundry was drenched in detergent. Had we done this first, we wouldn't have taken it all apart, scratched up Mike's hand, and curse as much as we did. We wiped all we could from the bottom of the drum, and threw two towels in there, and started up the washer.

We let it run for a few minutes, then drained it. We carefully watched the drain, and it never suds up. So we continued to run the washer and drain it for a few hours. A week later, and we're still not adding soap to our laundry. Some loads you need to add an extra rinse cycle to, but it never got messy. Thank God for that. This prompted a new house rule for Mike and me: Don't believe anything you read on the Internet.

Prepping Our New Home

We are making the big move to our new home this weekend. Mike and I have been slowly moving boxes and unpacking them at the home so we can concentrate on just the furniture on moving day. Each night we pack our cars with anything and everything and drop it off at the new house before or after work, depending on how early we leave. Nothing like getting really sweaty in your work clothes first thing in the a.m.!



Our new home is small. But that's OK. It's just the two of us, mortgage is still cheaper than rent, and it's OURS. We have a 1.5 attached car garage, and a short basement for storage (which is good, because we don't have enough closets!). On July 7 we are getting a German Shepherd puppy and I am way more excited about that than owning a home. Probably because the puppy is furry and easier to snuggle.

We prepped our home by painting the living room, dining room, master and spare bedrooms. After we started taping the trim and ceilings, we decided the kitchen can be the white that it is. We are having the hardest time choosing a color for it anyway, and the less taping and painting we have to do the better! What a tedious job. I don't have the patience or motivation for it! We have some touch ups to do, but they're where the ceiling meets the wall. Our ceilings are short--only about seven feet high--and Michael is tall, so he gets to finish perfecting our walls! I did the best I could on my tippy toes, but that doesn't allow me to be as sturdy as I should be! Plus, my neck was about to fall off.

We purchased all our paint from Menards, and there was a sale on Dutch Boy paint, so all our paint is the Ultra kind by them, which saved us from having to do multiple coats.

Spare Bedroom: Putting Green--this is a lot brighter than we imagined, but it's growing on us. I think that because it's such a small room without any other color in it right now it seems overwhelming.


Master Bedroom: Silvered Stone is the light color and Gray-cious is the accent wall--I love my master bedroom! I cannot wait to have it all put together!


Living/Dining Room: Misty Surf--this started drying a baby blue color, and I was scared. The sample was a lot more green. But, when it was completely painted and finally all dry we all fell in love with it. I cannot wait to get my brown furniture in here and see how it looks! The light in the two rooms makes it look like it's two different shades, depending on where you're standing. I love that.


We were noticing a lot of spiders as well. Good thing they don't freak me out! Michael bought some bug bombs that were safe to use inside. I feel bad doing it, but at the same time I don't want them in my home. There are also squirrels in our garage. A family of them. We're not sure how they are coming in, but we think there's a hole behind a speaker that was left in a corner. They're adorable, but I'd prefer if they lived outside.

Our home is small, and doesn't have much closet space. The small bathroom (and lack of a linen closet) and proved to be the biggest challenge for me. There are way too many options to choose from, but I think we have it figured out. There is only one bathroom, so eventually we want to make it a real show-stopper and trick it out with awesomeness. But in the meantime, I'll have to live with its ugly silver AND gold fixtures, including towel holders. Ugh. It could be worse, right? Right.

The main problem with the bathroom is there is a lot of wasted space. There are two windows that are causing us the most grief. The vanity and toilet create this empty corner underneath the windows. So for now we have a hamper there (since Mike cannot pick up his clothes from the bathroom floor, I'm hoping this helps!). There is also no medicine cabinet, so we're buying a corner medicine cabinet to put above the toilet. The space above the toilet and between the window frame is only 18" wide, so we were struggling to find a cabinet to fit there, but the angled cabinet will have a bit more storage, and I think easier to access over the toilet.



This is the corner cabinet we purchased from Walmart.com:



I'm also going to buy a wooden spice rack to put on the inside of the vanity cabinet door to store my hair sprays, hair gels, etc. I'm quickly learning how to maximize space! There are also floating shelves you can put inside the vanity to create storage, but my vanity doesn't have walls between the under cabinet part, and the drawers... But, for those of you with fancy walls in your vanity, you can purchase them at Menards! Or, anywhere probably, since they're just floating shelves! :)

When did it stop being OK to be patriotic?

I have to blog about this, because I've been thinking about it all week and cannot get over it. It's been bothering me that much.

On Memorial Day, this picture showed up in my Facebook newsfeed with this caption:


Nothing says "I love my nation!" like dismembering its flag and sewing it into a shirt!

There are eight "likes" and quite a few comments from others saying that no one understands the flag laws, that this shirt was probably made in China, etc. Not one person (including me--guilty) commented about how this is a ridiculous caption for this photo. I would like to chime in with the following, because this picture, and the fact I didn't comment, has been eating me alive: 


Ummm... Maybe he's just patriotic! It's Memorial Day! It's a polo shirt--not a flag that he stole from the local Perkin's parking lot and then maliciously sewed into a piece of clothing. When I was in elementary school we learned that if a flag touches the ground, you burn it. We learned you respect the flag, how to fold it, etc. This is not a flag. It never was a flag. It's always been a shirt. He didn't destroy a flag, or disrespect the nation. In fact, it's the complete opposite. He's supporting the US and showing his patriotism. So can we all just stop being such asses? Not everything has to be about something. Sometimes people just wear flag shirts, OK?

Losing Weight

I have become somewhat of a calorie counter, and have lost 12 pounds since I began on March 8. I don't really notice the difference yet, but a few people at work have noticed and said something so that's always great to hear! I think I've lost all my weight in my hand, as I can now fit my engagement ring no my middle finger.

I've been at a standstill for about three weeks now. I don't exercise, which I know would accelerate my weight loss, but I hate working out. I have never enjoyed it. I never feel accomplished afterward. I'm really hoping that being a busy-as-a-bee homeowner and mom-to-be German Shepherd will keep me more active. After all, caring for a big dog like that will FORCE me to, at the very least, get up off the couch and open the door for them to go outside. Of course I plan to be a great mommy and play with him/her and go for walks, all that. Michael and I are also planning on getting a push mower that doesn't have a motor. We have a relatively small yard, so the extra work shouldn't be too exasperating.

To help me keep track of my calories and understand portion control, I downloaded MyFitnessPal, a free smart phone app. They also have a website (www.myfitnesspal.com) for those who do not have a smart phone, and the two sync up so you can keep track via both. MyFitnessPal provides you with a daily calorie goal to stick to. When I lost 10 pounds, it dropped me a few hundred calories. I didn't think that was a very nice reward :P I don't strictly follow it, but I try. Sometimes you have to guess on the calories if you go out to eat, but quite a few restaurants have the nutrition information on their website. Of course, it's handy to know beforehand! 

Little changes really make a difference. If we grab fast food I try to go to Culvers so I can get mashed potatoes as a side instead of fries, or Subway. Carbs are my biggest weakness. I could never do the South Beach Diet! I do allow myself french fries, and other naughty foods here and there if we're out to eat! I'm sure if I was more disciplined, I'd lose more weight, but I'm not so here I am. Mike and I are in love with Skinny Cow ice cream desserts! If you haven't tried them do so right now! I have the biggest sweet tooth ever, and these really help to curve my need for chocolate, DQ blizzards and cupcakes. Are they as rich and decadent as the real deal? No, but they are really good for only 100 calories, so why not substitute it? I also love the Yoplait Whips Orange--it's the only yogurt I can eat. But, it's like 130 calories and does nothing to fill me up. It's a horrible snack, so to save me the calories I just stopped buying them. I wouldn't have realized what a waste it was without calorie counting. For lunches, I find Lean Cuisine the best for me. Their pizza is great, and so are the pasta dishes. For a frozen TV dinner, they're pretty damn good. You can usually catch a sale at Target, Wal-Mart or Festival which helps! For Mike's lunches I get him Smart Ones and Michelina's Lean ones. We've been eating tilapia more often than before too. It's great for a light meal. Hopefully we'll start buying ground turkey instead of beef as the next step.

The hardest thing for me is when I work until midnight at home. I still get up around 8 a.m., and I tend to get hungry around 9-10 p.m. If I just can't ignore it, I have a bowl of cereal. Ever since I can remember, I am really affected by hunger. I get queasy and lightheaded if I don't eat when my body needs me to. I also get really crabby. Mike told me that when he had his CPR and safety training at work, the teacher told him that woman are more affected by hunger than men. Interesting...

State Farm Insurance

Michael and I met with our insurance agent today for the home, and he couldn't be more amazing! He explained everything so clearly, was fast and tried to save us as much money as possible! No pressure from him whatsoever to go with a certain policy, add-on or State Farm in general! He's even sending Michael's car loan information to State Farm Bank to see if they can refinance it for a lower percentage rate--just because. If anyone in the Fox Valley area is looking for a freakin' awesome agent, let me know and I'll message you his contact information.

This is the only thing that went smoothly so far with the home purchase, so I'm pretty excited! I didn't know insurance could be so exciting.

Insurance

Some people's families pass down heirlooms, antiques, advice and wisdom, but my mom has given me her bad luck. Ever since I was little, my mother has complained about her down-right bad luck with insurance companies. All of them. They misspell names on the insurance cards, switch my last name for hers, they have poor service and they just plain suck.

I gathered a handful of quotes online for homeowner's insurance, and after comparing them all we settled with Farmer's Insurance. All the agents were quick to follow-up with us, but we chose the one with the lowest rate. We spoke with the agent on Wednesday, and she said that the next day she'd have our official/final quote. Well, we still had nothing the next week Monday, so Mike called, left a voicemail and didn't hear back. So today he called her three times with no answer or returned call. He just called a different office and left a message explaining that we need insurance and if this agent can't help us we'll go to a different insurer.

We close on May 31, so we kinda need insurance pretty quick here. Tonight we have some loan paperwork to go through with an estimate of what our insurance should be. Wish we could have the finalized numbers in there.

Le sigh.