Enemy Number One: Earwigs

Ever since day one of owning our new home, I noticed a buzzing noise whenever I opened the front door. People thought I was nuts, because it only happened if you hadn't opened it in quite a while, and no one ever heard it. I was convinced there was something living inside my door frame, since the noise always came from the top of the door jam. Finally Mike heard it too, and I wasn't crazy any more.


Then one day I was coming inside and saw an earwig on the outside of my front door. I instantly convinced myself they were the culprits living in my door! I picture them crowding inside my door frame in one large hoard. Sick! Sick! Sick!


Then I saw an earwig on the inside of my house. Then I found a few more. I called a pest control company right away and they came the next day and sprayed all around the outside of my house to stop earwigs (and any other pests) from trudging into MY home (a 30 day guarantee). I felt better having my home soaked in pesticides, and I stopped panicking anytime there was dirt on the floor (or just a dark spot on the wood-like laminate flooring we have). Then two days later I saw one darting across my wall late at night. OMG, they go up walls! Mike was asleep and if I woke him up for this he'd be very unhappy.


This little guy was fast, so I had to act fast. I grabbed a paper towel, wrapped it around Mike's shoe (never use your own--ew!), and smacked it. Eeeeeek! Why is it so hard for girly girls to kill bugs? Because they're sick, that's why. And you gotta get real close and they could suddenly have springs for legs and jump into your eye.


So I decided the best thing to do was read all about earwigs.


Orkin's website tells me they are not venomous, they do NOT go into people's ears and eat their brains--it's an old wives' tale--they rarely bite and probably just ventured into my home by human error--like the door was left open, or there's a hole in the window screen. They like warm, damp places, leaves and vegetation. OK. Feeling better.


But then I looked across my desk and saw my little potted plant. It has moist soil. I began to panic again, because obviously it was hosting an earwig party. Finally, I worked up my courage, grabbed the red ceramic pot and rushed it outside to the garage. Whew. Close call. Next I inspected our entryways and windows--nothing too obvious, but earwigs are tiny. Back to the computer.


I did a little research on how to get rid of earwigs, and this is what I came up with:

• Invite their enemy to your yard--birds. Get bird feeders or bird baths so they hang out (and hunt) in your area.
• Spray your plants/gardens with warm, soapy water--it acts as a natural pesticide. 
• Clear away leaves and other yard debris from your house so they aren't as close.
• Use dehumidifiers in your crawl space and attic to make it uninviting to them.
• Put vegetable oil in a small container where you think they are--They climb in, get stuck and die. 

And of course these tips were found on multiple websites, and forums. So I read the comments, and despite Orkin's professional documentation about earwigs, there were a few people who said they had an earwig in their ear. Oh. My. God. IN THEIR EAR! I know, I know--Mike and I have a house rule to not believe anything you read on the Internet (you can read about that here). But, this is different! Another person had an infestation in their bed. Where they sleep. Where I was headed...


Needless to say, my house plant is still in the garage, and earwigs are now on my long list of Things That Make Me Shriek. 

No Red Flag

Since our move I have had a hard time with the postal service. Our mail box is attached to our house (the walk-up kind), and it does not have a red flag or ribbon to alert the mail carrier to pick up my mail. I keep getting mail addressed to the previous tenant, and it just sits in my mail box. I feel like I need a flashing pink neon sign that reads, "For the love of God, take my outgoing mail!" Mike and I are going out tonight to find a solution. We're hoping to just find a red flag to screw on to our existing box. My dad has an old red ribbon that someone just taped into their mail box. Where do you get plastic red ribbon? The closest thing I have is a "The choice for me is drug free" red ribbon from God knows when.

Red flag woes aside, there is one other problem I had with the mail. On June 13 a package from Target arrived on my doorstep addressed to the previous tenant of my new home. The mail carrier didn't take the package even though I used a pink Sharpie to write "RTN to sender--not at this adderess". I gave it two days, but there it sat. I brought it in each night in case it rained. So I emailed Target asking if they could arrange UPS or FedEx (whoever their delivery service is) to come take it back since it's not my problem.

They requested multiple numbers and information from the shipping label (because apparently my address and her name were not enough clues). So, I sent them all the information I could gather from the label.

They returned telling me to print a return label and take it to a UPS store, and they are sending me a $5 Target gift card for the inconvenience. I also found out the order was placed on June 8. The previous tenant moved out the first weekend in May, so it's not really my fault she failed to update her address.

I told them I am not wasting any more time, or going out of my way to return this package to a UPS store. So, either they can arrange to have UPS pick it up, or I will drop it off at my local Target when I drive by it later today.

Am I being a total bitch? Maybe, but seriously I don't feel like wasting my ink, time or energy finding a UPS store and returning this girl's purchase just because she didn't bother to change her address. Perhaps this will lead to bad karma? I didn't try to steal it though, and I was dying to know what was inside.

So I dropped off the package at Target later that day. I was explaining the whole situation to the lady at the service desk, when she decided to open the box to find a packing slip. While I didn't think that was necessary, I was happy to find that it was a Mr. Coffee coffee maker. Whew, mystery solved. A little disappointed that it wasn't something super expensive though.

Next thing I know, I am being asked to select a reason for the return on the credit card machine. I said, "I don't want to return it, it's not mine." She exasperatedly replied, "I know, I know, but I cannot get past this part until you select a reason.So just pick one--any one--it doesn't matter" So I randomly chose "Changed my mind". Then I was told that $30 something will be returned to her credit card. I stepped back and said, "No! I do not have authorization to credit her credit card! I don't want to return it for money, I want to give it back to Target, so they can send it back to wherever it came from!" And I walked away.

I really feel like if the lady would have just listened to my explanation fully before jumping into opening the box, it would have gone a lot smoother. The fact that she said "...returned to HER credit card" I know she knew I wasn't the person who ordered it. I just need to make this face: O_o

Although all this was a nuisance, it was not at the fault of Target, so taking the $5 gift card makes me feel really guilty.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

There are few regrets I have in life, but what I did last Friday is definitely on that short list.

Before we purchased our new washer and dryer I talked to friends and family and read a lot of online reviews and forums. On a forum, someone wrote they thought the Whirlpool Duet washing machine was cool because it holds all the detergent for you from the bottle, and automatically dispenses it in the machine each wash. Mike and I ended up buying the Duet washer/dryer set because they were on sale at Menards with 0 payments and 0 interest for 12 months.

When we got it all set up and running, I didn't see in the directions where it said you could pour the entire detergent bottle in the washer, so I didn't. I did a few loads normally. Then Mike mentioned it as a feature to my parents, and I chimed in saying that I did it the old fashioned way, because the directions don't say that you can. And these appliances have tons of options... I'm not sure what they all are, even! Thank God there's a cycle called "normal" so I know what to fall back on!

But, last Friday... Last Friday I was feeling brave. I poured my entire bottle of detergent down the hole of my brand new washing machine. It's an HE washer and detergent, so it was good for 64 loads! After a few seconds, somehow my hand slipped a bit and I accidentally got some on the wall... Obviously God was slapping my hand saying "Stop!" But, I was all "Pfft... what does God know?!"

As I was emptying the soap into the washer, my gut was screaming "THIS IS WRONG!" I doubted it every step of the way, so I'm not sure why I continued to dump it in. But, it didn't start leaking or seem to get full. Once my canister was empty, I got even more paranoid to push the start button. So I sat on hold with Whirlpool for 12 minutes before someone answered. He was in Tennessee, and all I could picture was Ernie from Bent Forks, Tennessee (a character from "I Love Lucy"). Our conversation didn't go well. I told him which model I had, and asked if this "feature" was real. He said, "no." And he stuck to that answer. Then I asked him, "What if I already poured the entire bottle of detergent into the washing machine?" He kept telling me I shouldn't even be able to pour that much detergent in. I told him that it never started leaking, or backing up, or anything. He was insistent that I get it out if I can, because you're only supposed to use 1/2 cup at most. He didn't make me feel better, since he had to ask if my machine has a drawer I open to dispense the detergent... I'm not sure that he even truly knew what machine I was talking about, actually. He told me that if I run it with that much detergent in the washer, the suds could leak out the front, as well as back up the drain and leak suds there. Oh. My. God. What have I done?

I ran to True Value for a suction gun. The tube would NOT fit down the hole, so I finally called Michael. In tears. He was awesome and told me we'd get it out. So I ran back to True Value and got two sizes of flexible hose, both which still would NOT go down the hole. Please God fix this.

We have our washer/dryer stacked to save room, so thankfully I could help Mike lift the dryer down. I asked him if we should take the clothes out I had in there, but he said "No, it won't make a difference." I tell you this, because you'll find it amusing later on.

A handful of screws and a disconnected hose later, we got nothin'. The detergent doesn't go anywhere. We have no idea. We decide to put it back together, and this is where Mike gets cut up. The hose we disconnected is very flexible, and the metal tie that secures it to the plastic piece requires plyers. Basically, you need about five hands doing something, and there's barely room for one hand in this space. Plus, the opening where Mike needed to put his hands was edged in sharp metal. Pretty cool. Eventually, Mike got it re-attached.

So we finally decide to take the clothes out and run the washer. Well, when I was taking them out, I found the detergent. It goes right to the bottom of the drum. The bottom layer of laundry was drenched in detergent. Had we done this first, we wouldn't have taken it all apart, scratched up Mike's hand, and curse as much as we did. We wiped all we could from the bottom of the drum, and threw two towels in there, and started up the washer.

We let it run for a few minutes, then drained it. We carefully watched the drain, and it never suds up. So we continued to run the washer and drain it for a few hours. A week later, and we're still not adding soap to our laundry. Some loads you need to add an extra rinse cycle to, but it never got messy. Thank God for that. This prompted a new house rule for Mike and me: Don't believe anything you read on the Internet.

Prepping Our New Home

We are making the big move to our new home this weekend. Mike and I have been slowly moving boxes and unpacking them at the home so we can concentrate on just the furniture on moving day. Each night we pack our cars with anything and everything and drop it off at the new house before or after work, depending on how early we leave. Nothing like getting really sweaty in your work clothes first thing in the a.m.!



Our new home is small. But that's OK. It's just the two of us, mortgage is still cheaper than rent, and it's OURS. We have a 1.5 attached car garage, and a short basement for storage (which is good, because we don't have enough closets!). On July 7 we are getting a German Shepherd puppy and I am way more excited about that than owning a home. Probably because the puppy is furry and easier to snuggle.

We prepped our home by painting the living room, dining room, master and spare bedrooms. After we started taping the trim and ceilings, we decided the kitchen can be the white that it is. We are having the hardest time choosing a color for it anyway, and the less taping and painting we have to do the better! What a tedious job. I don't have the patience or motivation for it! We have some touch ups to do, but they're where the ceiling meets the wall. Our ceilings are short--only about seven feet high--and Michael is tall, so he gets to finish perfecting our walls! I did the best I could on my tippy toes, but that doesn't allow me to be as sturdy as I should be! Plus, my neck was about to fall off.

We purchased all our paint from Menards, and there was a sale on Dutch Boy paint, so all our paint is the Ultra kind by them, which saved us from having to do multiple coats.

Spare Bedroom: Putting Green--this is a lot brighter than we imagined, but it's growing on us. I think that because it's such a small room without any other color in it right now it seems overwhelming.


Master Bedroom: Silvered Stone is the light color and Gray-cious is the accent wall--I love my master bedroom! I cannot wait to have it all put together!


Living/Dining Room: Misty Surf--this started drying a baby blue color, and I was scared. The sample was a lot more green. But, when it was completely painted and finally all dry we all fell in love with it. I cannot wait to get my brown furniture in here and see how it looks! The light in the two rooms makes it look like it's two different shades, depending on where you're standing. I love that.


We were noticing a lot of spiders as well. Good thing they don't freak me out! Michael bought some bug bombs that were safe to use inside. I feel bad doing it, but at the same time I don't want them in my home. There are also squirrels in our garage. A family of them. We're not sure how they are coming in, but we think there's a hole behind a speaker that was left in a corner. They're adorable, but I'd prefer if they lived outside.

Our home is small, and doesn't have much closet space. The small bathroom (and lack of a linen closet) and proved to be the biggest challenge for me. There are way too many options to choose from, but I think we have it figured out. There is only one bathroom, so eventually we want to make it a real show-stopper and trick it out with awesomeness. But in the meantime, I'll have to live with its ugly silver AND gold fixtures, including towel holders. Ugh. It could be worse, right? Right.

The main problem with the bathroom is there is a lot of wasted space. There are two windows that are causing us the most grief. The vanity and toilet create this empty corner underneath the windows. So for now we have a hamper there (since Mike cannot pick up his clothes from the bathroom floor, I'm hoping this helps!). There is also no medicine cabinet, so we're buying a corner medicine cabinet to put above the toilet. The space above the toilet and between the window frame is only 18" wide, so we were struggling to find a cabinet to fit there, but the angled cabinet will have a bit more storage, and I think easier to access over the toilet.



This is the corner cabinet we purchased from Walmart.com:



I'm also going to buy a wooden spice rack to put on the inside of the vanity cabinet door to store my hair sprays, hair gels, etc. I'm quickly learning how to maximize space! There are also floating shelves you can put inside the vanity to create storage, but my vanity doesn't have walls between the under cabinet part, and the drawers... But, for those of you with fancy walls in your vanity, you can purchase them at Menards! Or, anywhere probably, since they're just floating shelves! :)