Enemy Number One: Earwigs

Ever since day one of owning our new home, I noticed a buzzing noise whenever I opened the front door. People thought I was nuts, because it only happened if you hadn't opened it in quite a while, and no one ever heard it. I was convinced there was something living inside my door frame, since the noise always came from the top of the door jam. Finally Mike heard it too, and I wasn't crazy any more.


Then one day I was coming inside and saw an earwig on the outside of my front door. I instantly convinced myself they were the culprits living in my door! I picture them crowding inside my door frame in one large hoard. Sick! Sick! Sick!


Then I saw an earwig on the inside of my house. Then I found a few more. I called a pest control company right away and they came the next day and sprayed all around the outside of my house to stop earwigs (and any other pests) from trudging into MY home (a 30 day guarantee). I felt better having my home soaked in pesticides, and I stopped panicking anytime there was dirt on the floor (or just a dark spot on the wood-like laminate flooring we have). Then two days later I saw one darting across my wall late at night. OMG, they go up walls! Mike was asleep and if I woke him up for this he'd be very unhappy.


This little guy was fast, so I had to act fast. I grabbed a paper towel, wrapped it around Mike's shoe (never use your own--ew!), and smacked it. Eeeeeek! Why is it so hard for girly girls to kill bugs? Because they're sick, that's why. And you gotta get real close and they could suddenly have springs for legs and jump into your eye.


So I decided the best thing to do was read all about earwigs.


Orkin's website tells me they are not venomous, they do NOT go into people's ears and eat their brains--it's an old wives' tale--they rarely bite and probably just ventured into my home by human error--like the door was left open, or there's a hole in the window screen. They like warm, damp places, leaves and vegetation. OK. Feeling better.


But then I looked across my desk and saw my little potted plant. It has moist soil. I began to panic again, because obviously it was hosting an earwig party. Finally, I worked up my courage, grabbed the red ceramic pot and rushed it outside to the garage. Whew. Close call. Next I inspected our entryways and windows--nothing too obvious, but earwigs are tiny. Back to the computer.


I did a little research on how to get rid of earwigs, and this is what I came up with:

• Invite their enemy to your yard--birds. Get bird feeders or bird baths so they hang out (and hunt) in your area.
• Spray your plants/gardens with warm, soapy water--it acts as a natural pesticide. 
• Clear away leaves and other yard debris from your house so they aren't as close.
• Use dehumidifiers in your crawl space and attic to make it uninviting to them.
• Put vegetable oil in a small container where you think they are--They climb in, get stuck and die. 

And of course these tips were found on multiple websites, and forums. So I read the comments, and despite Orkin's professional documentation about earwigs, there were a few people who said they had an earwig in their ear. Oh. My. God. IN THEIR EAR! I know, I know--Mike and I have a house rule to not believe anything you read on the Internet (you can read about that here). But, this is different! Another person had an infestation in their bed. Where they sleep. Where I was headed...


Needless to say, my house plant is still in the garage, and earwigs are now on my long list of Things That Make Me Shriek.